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It’s hard to grow up in this culture, especially
as a woman, and not feel extreme pressure to be thin. That pressure,
along with habitually using food in destructive ways, is a sure-fire
recipe for heartbreak and disaster in the form of chronic dieting,
and compulsive, emotional, and restrictive eating. However, as
a therapist, as well as a person who suffered through decades of
food challenges, diets, and binge-eating, I can say for certain
that recovery is within the grasp of every problem
eater.
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The Rules of “Normal” Eating:
A Commonsense Approach for Dieters, Overeaters, Undereaters, Emotional Eaters, and Everyone In Between!
by Karen R. Koenig, LICSW, M.Ed.
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This book is
a wonderful addition to the field of eating
disorders. Its cognitive-behavioral approach
provides a direct, clear message about the
steps that can be taken in the recovery process.
Karen Koenig’s honesty and openness
about her own struggles with food are delightful
to read. I would highly recommend this book
to my colleagues, clients and friends.” |
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-Beth Mayer, LICSW, 20
years of experience counseling in the field
of eating disorders |
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Provides
a roadmap with step-by-step directions
to normal eating. The chapter on self-care
without using food is superb.” |
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-Diane Keddy, registered
dietician |
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There is a “normal” eater inside of you that has
all the wisdom you need to develop a positive relationship with
food and keep you nourished. When you give up worrying about what
you weigh and begin to focus on what, when, and how much you really
want to eat, your natural mechanisms for feeding yourself will
gradually kick in. Through trial and error, with awareness and
practice, they will guide you toward a comfortable, satisfying,
pleasurable
relationship with food and your body.
Dieting is like putting a coat of paint on your house and covering up all its flaws, while becoming a "normal" eater requires transformation from the ground floor up—a painstaking, but rewarding process. Learning to stop eating for the wrong reasons and start eating for the right ones will not happen overnight, but may take months or years. To stop chronic dieting and compulsive overeating, you will have to dig deeply into yourself and connect to your hidden yearnings and fears. You will have to discover the truths about you and the deceptions you use to protect yourself and others from them, especially by abusing food. You will have to radically change your behavior to do more of what works and less of what doesn't.
During this process, connections to your authentic self will deepen
and broaden, while relationships with others may grow stronger
or weaker. The greatest changes you make will not necessarily be
with food or weight, but they will be exactly what you need to
do to become emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally
happier and healthier. That’s a guarantee.
Learning to stop eating compulsively or emotionally and begin eating "normally" is a process of skill-building that goes beyond food. If you think about all the things you've learned to do in life, all the changes you've made, you'll realize that becoming a "normal" eater is merely one more challenge. Along the way you will want to give up and return to your old eating habits, you will feel despair and delight, you will be appalled and amazed at yourself. You cannot go from being food-challenged to becoming a "normal" eater without your life improving exponentially in the long run. And you cannot fail to achieve your eating goals if you keep trying. One foot in front of the other is the only way to get there.
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